Wednesday, March 19, 2008
Last Tuesday, when I came home, I found myself under rapid fire from Mrs.B because of some highly illegal and unnecessary items I had purchased. I must say I was a bit stunned, I hadn't expected to be interogated by the Spanish inquisition.
But then again, no-one expects the Spanish inquisition...
Upside down on a stretching rack with needles underneath my toe nails and boiling hot oil dripping on my private parts, I quickly admitted my crimes. I had indeed purchased two jars of apple sauce AND two bottles of shampoo while there were still plenty of jars of apple sauce and bottle of shampoos in stock in the cellar. So – the prosecuter screamed at high voice while she made her whip crack – I had spent no less than seven euros extra. Seven euros from our rapidly dwindling budget. Now there wouldn't be enough food for us at the end of the month. The baby would starve, or we would have to eat him to survive ourselves. Monster that I am!
I feebly tried to argue that the items that I bought would serve us well sooner or later, but the prosecuter would listen to none of my whimpering arguments. A big €-sign was burnt into my forehead, so that all can see what happens to mad spenders like me.
Three days later – in a totally unrelated event – my wife reminded me that she would go over to the neighbours' house for an 'evening with the girls'. Apart from 'the girls' there would be a saleswoman promoting make-up and other beauty products. Mrs.B assured me that she wouldn't spend a lot of money. Just for safety she'd withdrawn 40 € from our account, but of course she wouldn't spend it all. By golly, no! She hardly ever uses any make-up anyway.
And true to her word, when she returned a couple of hours later, not a single coin had left her purse. But only because she ordered for way more than 40 € worth of products. Not that she had succumbed to any peer pressure or the slick presentation of the saleswoman, you understand. She had just bought some utterly essential hard to get by very important urgently needed products for herself and for the baby. And all that for a measly 61 €.