Elizabeth Barrett-Browning
Elizabeth Barrett (1806-1861) 
She was married with Robert Browning.
Sonnets from The Portuguese
PART 2

XXIII

Is it indeed so? If I lay here dead, 
Wouldst thou miss any life in losing mine? 
And would the sun for thee more coldly shine 
Because of grave-damps falling round my head? 
I marveled, my Beloved, when I read 
Thy thought so in the letter. I am thine-- 
But...so much to thee? Can I pour your wine 
While my hands tremble? Then my soul, instead 
Of dreams of death, resumes life's lower range. 
Then, love me, Love! Look on me--breathe on me! 
As brighter ladies do not count it strange, 
For love, to give up acres and degree, 
I yield the grave for thy sake, and exchange 
My near sweet view of Heaven, for earth with thee! 

XXIV

Let the world's sharpness, like a clasping knife, 
Shut in upon itself and do no harm 
In this close hand of Love, now soft and warm, 
And let us hear no sound of human strife 
After the click of the shutting. Life to life-- 
I lean upon thee, Dear, without alarm, 
And feel as safe as guarded by a charm 
Against the stab of worldlings, who if rife 
Are weak to injure. Very whitely still 
The lilies of our lives may reassure 
Their blossoms from their roots, accessible 
Alone to heavenly dews that drop not fewer; 
Growing straight, out of man's reach, on the hill. 
God only, who made us rich, can make us poor.

XXV

A heavy heart, Belovèd, have I borne 
From year to year until I saw thy face, 
And sorrow after sorrow took the place 
Of all those natural joys as lightly worn 
As the stringed pearls, each lifted in its turn 
By a beating heart at dance-time. Hopes apace 
Were changed to long despairs, till God's own grace 
Could scarcely lift above the world forlorn 
My heavy heart. Than thou didst bid me bring 
And let it drop adown thy calmly great 
Deep being! Fast it sinketh, as a thing 
Which its own nature doth precipitate, 
While thine doth close above it, mediating 
Betwixt the stars and the unaccomplished fate. 

XXVI

I lived with visions for my company 
Instead of men and women, years ago, 
And found them gentle mates, nor thought to know 
A sweeter music than they played to me. 
But soon their trailing purple was not free 
Of this world's dust, their lutes did silent grow, 
And I myself grew faint and blind below 
Their vanishing eyes. Then thou didst come--to be, 
Belovèd, what they seemed. Their shining fronts, 
Their songs, their splendors (better, yet the same, 
As river water hallowed into fonts), 
Met in thee, and from out thee overcame 
My soul with satisfaction of all wants: 
Because God's gifts put man's best dreams to shame. 

XXVII

My dear Belovèd, who hast lifted me 
From this drear flat of earth where I was thrown, 
And, in betwixt the languid ringlets, blown 
A life-breath, till the forehead hopefully 
Shines out again, as all the angels see, 
Before thy saving kiss! My own, my own, 
Who camest to me when the world was gone, 
And I who looked for only God, found thee! 
I find thee; I am safe, and strong, and glad. 
As one who stands in dewless asphodel 
Looks backward on the tedious time he had 
In the upper life,--so I, with bosom-swell, 
Make witness, here, between the good and bad, 
That Love, as strong as Death, retrieves as well. 

XXVIII

My letters-- all dead paper, mute and white! 
And yet they seem alive and quivering 
Against my tremulous hands which loose the string 
And let them drop down on my knee to-night, 
This said,--he wished to have me in his sight 
Once, as a friend: this fixed a day in spring 
To come and touch my hand...a simple thing, 
Yet I wept for it!--this...the paper's light... 
Said, Dear, I love thee; and I sank and quailed 
As if God's future thundered on my past. 
This said, I am thine--and so its ink has paled 
With lying at my heart that beat too fast. 
And this...O Love, thy words have ill availed 
If, what this said, I dared repeat at last! 

XXIX

I think of thee!--my thoughts do twine and bud 
About thee,as wild vines, about a tree, 
Put out broad leaves, and soon there's nought to see 
Except the straggling green which hides the wood. 
Yet, O my palm-tree, be it understood 
I will not have my thoughts instead of thee 
Who art dearer, better! Rather, instantly 
Renew thy presence; as a strong tree should, 
Rustle thy boughs and set thy trunk all bare, 
And let these bands of greenery which insphere thee 
Drop heavily down,--burst, shattered, everywhere! 
Because, in this deep joy to see and hear thee 
And breathe within thy shadow a new air, 
I do not think of thee--I am too near thee. 

XXX

I see thine image through my tears to-night, 
And yet to-day I saw thee smiling. How 
Refer the cause?--Belovèd, is it thou 
Or I , who makes me sad? The acolyte 
Amid the chanted joy and thankful rite 
May so fall flat, with pale insensate brow 
On the alter stair, I hear thy voice and vow, 
Perplexed, uncertain, since thou art out of sight, 
As he, in his swooning ears, the choir's amen. 
Belovèd, dost thou love? or did I see all 
The glory as I dreamed, and fainted when 
Too vehement light dilated my ideal, 
For my soul's eyes? Will that light come again, 
As now these tears come--falling hot and real? 

XXXI

Thou comest! all is said without a word. 
I sit beneath thy looks, as children do 
In the noon-sun, with souls that tremble through 
Their happy eyelids from an unaverred 
Yet prodigal inward joy. Behold, I erred 
In that last doubt! and yet I cannot rue 
The sin most, but the occasion--that we two 
Should for a moment stand unministered 
By a mutual presence. Ah, keep near and close, 
Thou dovelike help! and, when my fears would rise, 
With thy broad heart serenely interpose: 
Brood down with thy divine sufficiencies 
These thoughts which tremble when bereft of those, 
Like callow birds left desert to the skies. 

XXXII

The first time that the sun rose on thine oath 
To love me, I looked forward to the moon 
To slacken all those bonds which seemed too soon 
And quickly tied to make a lasting troth. 
Quick-loving hearts, I thought, may quickly loathe; 
And, looking on myself, I seemed not one 
For such man's love!--more like an out-of-tune 
Worn viol, a good singer would be wroth 
To spoil his song with, and which, snatched in haste, 
Is laid down at the first ill-sounding note. 
I did not wrong myself so, but I placed 
A wrong on thee For perfect strains may float 
'Neath master-hands, from instruments defaced,-- 
And great souls, at one stroke, may do and dote. 


XXXIII

Yes, call me by my pet-name! let me hear 
The name I used to run at, when a child, 
From innocent play, and leave the cowslips piled, 
To glance up in some face that proved me dear 
With the look of its eyes. I miss the clear 
Fond voices which, being drawn and reconciled 
Into the music of Heaven's undefiled, 
Call me no longer. Silence on the bier, 
While I call God--call God!--So let thy mouth 
Be heir to those who are now exanimate. 
Gather the north flowers to complete the south, 
And catch the early love up in the late. 
Yes, call me by that name,--and I, in truth, 
With the same heart, will answer and not wait. 

XXXIV

With the same heart, I said, I'll answer thee 
As those, when thou shalt call me by my name-- 
Lo, the vain promise! is the same, the same, 
Perplexed and ruffled by life's strategy? 
When called before, I told how hastily 
I dropped my flowers or brake off from a game, 
To run and answer with the smile that came 
At play last moment, and went on with me 
Through my obedience. When I answer now, 
I drop a grave thought, break from solitude; 
Yet still my heart goes to thee--ponder how-- 
Not as to a single good, but all my good! 
Lay thy hand on it, best one, and allow 
That no child's foot could run as fast as this blood. 

XXXV

If I leave all for thee, wilt thou exchange 
And be all to me? Shall I never miss 
Home-talk and blessings and the common kiss 
That comes to each in turn, nor count it strange, 
When I look up, to drop on a new range 
Of walls and floors, another home than this? 
Nay, wilt thou fill that place by me which is 
Filled by dead eyes too tender to know change? 
That's hardest. If to conquer love, has tried, 
To conquer grief, tries more, as all things prove; 
For grief indeed is love and grief beside. 
Alas, I have grieved so I am hard to love. 
Yet love me--wilt thou? Open thine heart wide, 
And fold within the wet wings of thy dove.

XXXVI

When we met first and loved, I did not build 
Upon the event with marble. Could it mean 
To last, a love set pendulous between 
Sorrow and sorrow? Nay, I rather thrilled, 
Distrusting every light that seemed to gild 
The onward path, and feared to over-lean 
A finger even. And, though I have grown serene 
And strong since then, I think that God has willed 
A still renewable fear...O love, O troth... 
Lest these enclaspèd hands should never hold, 
This mutual kiss drop down between us both 
As an unowned thing, once the lips being cold. 
And Love, be false! if he, to keep one oath, 
Must lose one joy, by his life's star foretold.

XXXVII

Pardon, oh, pardon, that my soul should make, 
Of all that strong divineness which I know 
For thine and thee, an image only so 
Formed of the sand, and fit to shift and break. 
It is that distant years which did not take 
Thy sovranty, recoiling with a blow, 
Have forced my swimming brain to undergo 
Their doubt and dread, and blindly to forsake 
Thy purity of likeness and distort 
Thy worthiest love to a worthless counterfeit: 
As if a shipwrecked Pagan, safe in port, 
His guardian sea-god to commemorate, 
Should set a sculptured porpoise, gills a-snort 
And vibrant tail, within the temple gate. 

XXXVIII

First time he kissed me, he but only kissed 
The fingers of this hand wherewith I write; 
And ever since, it grew more clean and white, 
Slow to world-greetings, quick with its Oh, list, 
When the angels speak. A ring of amethyst 
I could not wear here, plainer to my sight, 
Than that first kiss. The second passed in height 
The first, and sought the forehead, and half missed, 
Half falling on the hair. O beyond meed! 
That was the chrism of love, which love's own crown, 
With sanctifying sweetness, did precede. 
The third upon my lips was folded down 
In perfect, purple state; since when, indeed, 
I have been proud and said, My love, my own. 

XXXIX

Because thou hast the power and own'st the grace 
To look through and behind this mask of me 
(Against which years have beat thus blanchingly 
With their rains), and behold my soul's true face, 
The dim and weary witness of life's race, 
Because thou hast the faith and love to see, 
Through that same soul's distracting lethargy, 
The patient angel waiting for a place 
In the new Heavens,--because nor sin nor woe, 
Nor God's infliction, nor death's neighbourhood, 
Nor all which others viewing, turn to go, 
Nor all of which makes me tired of all, self-viewed,-- 
Nothing repels thee,...Dearest, teach me so 
To pour out gratitude, as thou dost, good! 


XL

Oh, yes! they love through all this world of ours! 
I will not gainsay love, called love forsooth, 
I have heard love talked in my early youth, 
And since, not so long back but that the flowers 
Then gathered, smell still. Mussulmans and Giaours, 
Throw kerchiefs at a smile, and have no ruth 
For any weeping. Polypheme's white tooth 
Slips on the nut if, after frequent showers, 
The shell is over-smooth,-- and not so much 
Will turn the thing called love, aside to hate 
Or else to oblivion. But thou art not such 
A lover, my Belovèd! thou canst wait 
Through sorrow and sickness, to bring souls to touch, 
And think it soon when others cry Too late.

XLI

I thank all who have loved me in their hearts, 
With thanks and love from mine. Deep thanks to all 
Who paused a little near the prison-wall 
To hear my music in its louder parts 
Ere they went onward, each one to the mart's 
Or temple's occupation, beyond call. 
But thou, who, in my voice's sink and fall 
When the sob took it, thy divinest Art's 
Own instrument didst drop down at thy foot 
To hearken what I said between my tears,... 
Instruct me how to thank thee! Oh, to shoot 
My soul's full meaning into future years, 
That they should lend it utterance, and salute 
Love that endures, from Life that disappears! 

XLII

My future will not copy fair my past-- 
I wrote that once; and thinking at my side 
My ministering life-angel justified 
The word by his appealing look upcast 
To the white throne of God, I turned at last, 
And there, instead, saw thee, not unallied 
To angels in thy soul! Then I, long tried 
By natural ills, received the comfort fast, 
While budding, at thy sight, my pilgrim's staff 
Gave out green leaves with morning dews impearled. 
I seek no copy now of life's first half: 
Leave here the pages with long musing curled, 
And write me new my future's epigraph, 
New angel mine, unhoped for in the world! 

XLIII

How do I love thee? Let me count the ways. 
I love thee to the depth and breadth and height 
My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight 
For the ends of Being and ideal Grace. 
I love thee to the level of everyday's 
Most quiet need, by sun and candle-light. 
I love thee freely, as men strive for Right; 
I love thee with the passion put to use 
In my old griefs, and with my childhood's faith. 
I love thee with a love I seemed to lose 
With my lost saints,--I love thee with the breath, 
Smiles, tears, of all my life!--and, if God choose, 
I shall but love thee better after death. 

XLIV

Belovèd, thou hast brought me many flowers 
Plucked in the garden, all the summer through 
And winter, and it seemed as if they grew 
In this close room, nor missed the sun and showers. 
So, in the like name of that love of ours, 
Take back these thoughts which here unfolded too, 
And which on warm and cold days I withdrew 
From my heart's ground. Indeed, those beds and bowers 
Be overgrown with bitter weeds and rue, 
And wait thy weeding; yet here's eglantine, 
Here's ivy!--take them, as I used to do 
Thy flowers, and keep them where they shall not pine. 
Instruct thine eyes to keep their colours true, 
And tell thy soul, their roots are left in mine. 

1850


Robert Brownings' nickname for Elizabeth
was "my little Portugese"




Elizabeth Barrett Browning
Part 1


Elizabeth Barrett Browning
Love poems


Dead Poetesses Society

E. Barrett Browning
in het Nederlands


E. Barrett Browning
auf Deutsch


E. Barrett Browning - Portugese XLIII
English=>Nederlands=>Deutsch



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© Gaston D'Haese: 03-10-2004.
Update 06-03-2017.