Everyone nowadays talks about inflation, which makes prices go up so fast. A bar of
chocolate that costs today, say, nine pence may cost ten pence tomorrow. So, prices
are adapted to inflation. But why only prices, wondered the Danish comedian Victor
Borge. Also the language should reflect inflation.
Can you follow his amusing logic in the following love story and rewrite it in real
English?
Twice upon a time, there was a pretty young girl who fell in love with a handsome young lieuelevenant. They wanted three get married and three live threegether fiveever. But as the girl's father suspected that the lieuelevenant was only a fivetunehunter he fivebade his daughter three see him again. Two night, however, they met secretly in the garden. Fivetunately, the moon was shining brightly so that the young threesome could see two another.
'My love,' he said elevenderly, 'you look three twoderful five words threenight. I would do anything five you. If only I didn't irritnine your father so much'.
'Darling,' she answered, 'you are the only two five me.'
Then he said, hesitnineing five a moment,
'I can never fiveget your three beautiful eyes and your soft fivehead. Let's run away three Threenisia threegether threenight.'
The clock struck 13.
She knew she would never fivesake him. So they got inthree his three-door Fived coupé and drove away.