Arachnophobia

Review by Thomas Glorieux:

Not like the recent Eight Legged Freaks which was simply an amusing B-flick with giant spiders, it didn't seem that size mattered if you really needed a scare. Arachnophobia was and is still considered immensely frightening because who doesn't scream when he or she spots a tiny little spider in the bedroom or on the wall. So you obviously needed to get the score when in fact it was just through coincidence I stumbled upon a used copy already drilled with holes in it that I acquired Arachnophobia, of course only to hear Trevor Jones' score mixed after all the songs. That was in fact the idea but once more we have seen the ultimate stupidity of soundtrack producers who have in fact no idea of what they are doing in their professional life. Easily, Arachnophobia is one of the most lousy produced albums I have ever come across in my entire life. The only reason why this score gets its quotation is because of the quality of Trevor Jones' music and of course the fact that I only give the quote based on the movie music of the actual film. Not counting the songs which are chosen for one fact, because they carry a word that has got something to do with spiders.

Yes, almost 75% has got something of vocabulary connected to spiders, if it is the appropriate 'Arachnophobia', 'Spider', 'Web' or 'Bug', its here to be found on the album. Knowing not if they appear for even 5 seconds in the film, even these songs don't fit with the genre of the movie. Yes, as strange as it sounds, only 2 of them minimum carry a sense that they were chosen with common sense. 'Arachnophobia' is a Prince style disco song that listens fine on itself but not for the movie it accompanies, the same counts for 'Spiders and Snakes' and for 'Caught in your Web'. Yet this isn't even the least of my problems, almost any track (apart from several) carry dialogue and even if its short, it stinks. The dialogue is in mono while you directly hear the stereo song or score after it and it is chosen simply for being there, meaning you could hear dialogue that is heard in the film 30 minutes before or after the track it accompanies. The best example of this absolute ignorance is 'Caught in your Web', while the begin of the instrumental love ballad tries to take solid ground, there is Jeff Daniels saying "There are spiders in my house" while John Goodman responds to that, during a goddamn song that absolutely doesn't fit with it. Oh, it gets better, they even mix the dialogue with the actual score. Sad but true, 'The Casket Arrives' begins with dialogue of Goodman saying something against the new neighbors in the town while the actual lovely main theme is played, portraying us a scene showed 20 minutes before that actual said dialogue, how stupid is that. Now a little word about the music of Jones, since that is the only decent thing on this score to be found to digest.

While not stated on the back cover of the album, there are short pieces of Jones' score between the songs, almost all covering dialogue and this means you hear dialogue in even a 30 second track, making no goddamn sense. 'Miller's Demise' states briefly the spider theme while 'Delbert Squishes the Spider' uses the quite fun theme for the comic sidekick played by John Goodman, heard more prominently yet sadly with dialogue in begin and end of 'Delbert's Theme', performed on sax, harmonica and piano in a really joyful mix of wit and style. 'Main Title' captures for 5 minutes the ethnic beauty of scores like Last of the Mohicans with a grand main theme (reminding me easily of the music in Harry and the Hendersons) on ethnic flutes and performed in the grand Jones' manner, meaning thematic powerhouse on orchestral level. This repeats itself gentler in 'The Casket Arrives'. The longest track is sadly also the least revealing of them all. 'Canaima Nightmare' covers some more dark music with several dissonant moments while the end of that track is flourished up by the good main theme version, even if it ends somewhat dark and with goddamn dialogue. 'Along Came a Spider' is what I call a short lullaby with some dark tones mixed in while some good action horror music blesses us only for 1.15 in 'Cellar Theme'. And luckily we have a grand finish of Jones' main theme in 'End Title' and I mean GRAND but again for the thousands time, there is that dialogue making a mockery of Jones' music with again its unnecessary inclusion.

It is an awful shame for the lovely score of Jones' that this ridiculous album is released in such a manner. While the quality of Trevor Jones' score surpasses even all the songs, it is the production that is quite disgraceful. Dialogue flows out from right to left, the front cover doesn't even state one name of the artists to be found on the score (people who don't know a lot could easily buy the movie on CD-ROM for PC), the back cover easily deletes the short score clips in the begin (probably for not showing their stupid running length) and even the songs are so out of place for a movie like this, it is ridiculous. I'm even wondering if several of them are used during the movie or just placed on it because they carry for goodness sake "Spider" in them. So this is an album that disgraces both the song fans as the score fans with an ignorant display of everything that is empty in the brains of producers. I got only one thing to say. If soundtrack labels think they can keep doing this then go right ahead. It is your choice. Yet here is my choice, don't buy this score for a normal price. Buy it for the cheapest price or even download or copy it. This is simply an example of a score album that isn't worth the entire price. Not because of the quality of Jones' music which is perfect for the movie yet for the brutal produced album he is forced in it to release. Dialogue and shit songs which aren't heard or fit with the genre aren't well respected for the overall fan who enjoys the proper music of the film. In fact they make me get something called "crapophobia", meaning I hate crappy constructed soundtrack albums. By all means don't give more then 2$ on Arachnophobia! I'm warning you!!!

Arachnophobia "Expanded"

With one of the worst commercial releases I know, Arachnophobia is still a good score to hear, if you take everything away from it that not stands for Trevor Jones' music. Now, with an expanded Japanese release of the score, you can just do that. Getting 40 minutes (meaning more then on the original release), and without any song or dialogue, this release is just made for you. It makes of course the commercial one totally forgettable, and above all shows the light horror quality underscore much better then those nasty dialogues attached to it. Of course, much remains the same, like the opening track 'Main Title' with its too lovely theme for the picture, still its flowing grandeur with ethnic accompaniment is just perfect for the visuals and when Jones alters it in a sweet soft nature in 'The Casket Arrives', it just proves how well it functions in the movie. What is most noticeable however from the release is that Jones of course layers more underscore, darker underscore upon us, but no way does it get in the league of his more recent work as From Hell and The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen, which made them weak and boring mood setters, those moments I mean. Here it works more as light horror music that moves slowly forward with subtle effect, with of course occasional growing scares, but no way are these dissonant stabs in the dark that haunt you still after hours. In 'Bob Hitches a Ride' it suddenly happens, but the brief Spider theme suddenly explains why, it grows briefly this theme to make the point more clear. 'Photus Manli' is the same, yet here no sudden bursts of the orchestra, but the Spider theme softly makes its point between the ethnic mood setting. 'Under the Bleachers' is different in setting the spider theme under a more urgent rhythm which makes the effect by then more interesting as wel. 'Molly's Web' is however a little on the forgettable side and is nothing more then low underscore that fails to inspire after minutes.

Naturally, there are some lighter moments, as the main theme or the theme for John Goodman's character 'Delbert's Theme', which is a fun bouncing harmonica and piano creation which sounds very comedic but fitting also for the character. A cello gives more somber color to 'Along Came a Spider', especially in the begin setting the tones to the song everyone knows as Itsy Bitsy Spider. A percussion drum rhythm is noticed in 'Bugs-B-Gone', along with the ever noticeable rising pluck motif that sets the spider's presence more at stake here, but the growing ruckus in the orchestra makes an end to that. The wonderful slow moving flute and trombone setting of the Spider theme makes all the wonder happening in 'Canainma Nightmare', especially because it grows to its climax near the end sharply and deadly, while a more playful violin scherzo sets some urgency to that. The main theme is noticed warmer in 'Life in the Country' while a truly wonderful but short horror minute is spend on 'The Cellar', while still not containing those final attacking minutes of the movie sadly, it does set the point well with some brass fanfares and shrieking violins. The main theme is reprised in 'End Title', and as said it does it wonderful and with pride. While the score packs more minutes, its especially the mood that Jones sets well with his underscore, and without the intrusion of the dialogue or the songs, it simply improves better near the end, making the final main theme a much better finale then ever imagined. Arachnophobia is therefore only a score to listen to if you can obtain the Japanese release. Sadly, this is difficult but when achieved, its effect is ten times the improvement then that of the commercial release. Therefore its a must for those who enjoyed Jones' score on the commercial release, but realized as I the songs and dialogue belonged in the movie, like they should have remained there in the first place to begin with.

Arachnophobia: * Score: *** Songs: *
Arachnophobia "Expanded": *** Score: ***

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Tracks

Single Disc

1. Blue Eyes Are Sensitive To The Light: Sara Hickman * (5.12)

2. Atherton's Terrarium (0.17)

3. Arachnophobia: Brent Hutchins * (4.52)

4. Miller's Demise * (0.38)

5. Spiders And Snakes: The Party * (3.41)

6. Offspring * (0.40)

7. Boris The Spider: Pleasure Thieves * (3.00)

8. Delbert Squishes The Spider * (0.48)

9. The Spider And The Fly: The Poorboys * (2.56)

10. Web Photo (0.23)

11. Caught In Your Web: Russell Hitchcock * (4.54)

12. Main Title * (5.36)

13. Don't Bug Me: Jimmy Buffett (3.27)

14. The Casket Arrives * (1.55)

15. Delbert's Theme * (2.05)

16. Canaima Nightmare * (6.21)

17. Along Came A Spider * (2.29)

18. Cellar Theme * (1.15)

19. End Title * (3.55)

20. I Left My Heart In San Francisco: Tony Bennett * (3.03)

* Contains solo dialogue

Total Length: 57.58

Arachnophobia "Expanded"

1. Main Title (5.38)

2. Photus Manli (2.23)

3. Bob Hitches A Ride (4.18)

4. The Casket Arrives (1.53)

5. Molly's Web (3.28)

6. Spider Lamp Shade (1.54)

7. Delbert's Theme (2.31)

8. Under The Bleachers (2.05)

9. Along Came A Spider (2.26)

10. Bugs-B-Gone (3.04)

11. Canainma Nightmare (3.45)

12. Life In The Country (0.56)

13. The Cellar (1.16)

14. End Title (3.52)

Total Length: 39.36

The use of artwork or photos is posted for non profitable reasons

=== Link to Composer Site: Trevor Jones ===